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Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Catholic Shampoo

While shopping in a food store, two nuns happened to pass by


the beer cooler. One nun said to the other, "Wouldn't a nice cold

beer or two taste wonderful on a hot summer evening?"



The second nun answered, "Indeed it would sister, but I would not

feel comfortable buying beer as I am certain it would cause a scene at the checkout."



"I can handle that without a problem." she replied as she picked up a six-pack and headed for the checkout.



"The cashier had a surprised look on his face when the two nuns

arrived with a six-pack of beer. One of the nuns explained "We use beer for washing our hair, a shampoo of sort, if you will."



Without blinking an eye, the cashier reached under the counter,

pulled out a package of pretzel sticks and placed them in the bag

with the beer. He looked the nun straight in the eye, smiled and

said, "The curlers are on the house."

Monday, October 4, 2010

American travelers without compassion

I'm positive I have ranted about this before. If I have then you're going to hear it again. This is something that just hits me in the right spot.

Most Americans are insensitive to those with ADA (American Disabilities Act) needs. I hate all you fuckers that can't do the right thing.

Just a bit of a background about me. In my work position I ensure that those folks with legitimate disabilities, regardless how minor, have access to the accessible facilities that my company provides our guests. One of the ways we ensure this is that we have a form that must be completed and returned that lets us know that the guests in those rooms need them.

This week a guest called to inform us that they needed an accessible stateroom in order to travel on the particular trip they are scheduled for. After contacting the travel agents of the guests in the rooms without that form on file I was contacted by a particular agent that clearly has a problem with her morality compass and was never taught to do the right thing as a child.

When I asked her  if her guests needed the room that they were in she stated that "no they don't need it, but the wife had broken her hand and it would be easier for her to be in this room".

I asked her to please consider moving her guests to another room then since we have someone that needs this room because it's wheelchair accessible. She actually refused to move her guests.

Even after trying to appeal to her better nature and explain that this person is in a wheelchair full time and needs this room to travel she still said "no".

What a *twunt.

While I won't move her guests from the room at this time, I let the front office and housekeeping staff know that the guests currently scheduled for that room don't need it.

What is wrong with this woman that she can't do the right thing? At what point in her life did she decide that people with disabilities were lesser human beings? As someone that has a few family members that are disabled in one form or another this really got to me.

I think the ability to show any real compassion towards those with a disability is a problem that afflicts most Americans.

Yes you heard me. Americans are insensitive to others around them. They seem to have a sense of entitlement about them that is apparently a key to walk on others. It is the same affliction that makes it OK for Americans to travel to foreign countries and believe that those cultures will speak English and welcome them  with open arms. It is the same affliction that apparently provides American travelers with the belief that they will be able to have the same comfortable accomodations abroad that they would have at home and expect those comforts.

Yes I do realise that I am an American and that I'm basically painting a target on myself but I also believe that I am one of the exceptions and that there are other like me. That is after all why I do what I do. It's not a glamorous job and I make very little money for my efforts, but I believe in what I do and that is important to me.

I've rambled so back to my point.
The one singular thing that keeps me hung up on this issue is that even after telling her that if it was her guests that needed a wheelchair accessible room to travel, I would be making this search on their behalf. I even pushed it so far as to ask her "to do the correct and moral thing and let the room go to someone that needs it" and was still told "no".

I just hope that one day she will be become better acquainted with ADA laws in this country. I know that they are confusing, but they are there for a reason.




*note: twunt is my own amalgamated word combining twat and cunt. Feel free to incorporate it into your vocabulary.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Stalking celebrities in Seattle

This has been a record weekend for the Paisley and I. This weekend has brought us two celebrities sightings.

I fournd out Friday afternoon that Dan Akroyd was going to be in town on Saturday to promote his Crystal Head Vodka. We got arrived at the liquor store about 45 minutes before Dan did. He arrived in his Crystal Head RV and got set up in the store pretty quick. Once  he was in and sitting there was no messing around.  

The man Dan reaching for my copy of The Blues Brothers anniversary DVD to sign after signing my 1/2 gallon of Crystal Head.

Here's the Paisley with Dan in an awesome handshake. I had a photo taken as welll or so I thought, but apparently the guy I asked to take the photo couldn't work my camera. Such is life I guess. I know I was there and I have other photos so I'm still happy with the day.

And finally here I am with my 1/2 gallon of Crystal Head. I haven't cracked it open yet. Not sure if I will just yet.

Tonight we stalk Harry Connick Jr. He's in town for a concert at the winery and I got my Paisley some tix for her birthday to go and see him tonight.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Cocktail Misery

Charles Dickens walks into a bar and orders a martini, bartender say “Olive or Twist?”